Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Another Year

It's been so long, I'm a bit surprised I haven't written earlier.

I've been very very busy, I am in Canada now and I've been here for about a month and a half, so there's about 3 months left of my first stay. Moving took a lot of energy, I don't even remember how many times I re-packed.
I ended up bringing extra luggage too, packed in my brothers old computer box.

Anyway, before that I went to my last Swedish lolita meet. We went to a museum and then for tea. I wasn't going to join at first since I am not too fond of the place we went to but since I had no one to hang out with while the girls who stayed with me went for tea I tagged along.


Here's a picture of me that my friend took before the meetup. It was photoshopped by a friendly anon on cgl.
I don't usually shoop things myself due to wanting to retain a natural aspect but it was fun to see what people could do to my image.

During the whole moving deal I got lost from my lifting. Actually I gained some weight (fat) during my last time in Sweden and first month (ish) here. I'm working on getting my measurements back down though and it's going well. I've also upped my squat which feels great. I'm really close to squatting my bodyweight now.

Early during my visit here my friend Mike celebrated his birthday and I tagged along. It was a strange night indeed, but I had a good time at karaoke with a lot of strong duets with my dearest Lucy.
She also took this outfit picture of me: 


Wearing ETC cardigan, VM blouse, IW belt and JM skirt, the rest is offbrand.


I've done a few more outfits but not photographed them sadly, got to get to that!

Short post today, more later!
Love
Vanessa

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

That there IW Luckypack

Wosh! Got my IW Oddments Luckypack B!
Or well, I didn't get it, my boyfriend did and I had him open it for me.
The B pack is the bigger of the two. I got 33 items total!

Stock Photos are at my flickr

Item rundown:


Night bear cutsew OP Pinkxchocolate
lolibrary.org/node/7792
8295yen

Pearl Beads jsk, long, blue
lolibrary.org/node/721
21840yen

Nicolas Fruit JSK, begie
lolibrary.org/node/822
23940yen

Mellisa JSK Cream
lolibrary.org/node/740
17640yen

Flora JSK, long, milk tea
lolibrary.org/node/748
20790yen

Tulle Lace 3 ribbon jsk "pink"
lolibrary.org/node/3886
18690yen

Linderhof JSK, long, begie
lolibrary.org/node/4207
22890yen

Cross Neck Tiered Jumperskirt, wine, long
lolibrary.org/node/4398
24990yen

Pomona JSK Long
http://lolibrary.org/node/783
22890

Classical Square OP, brown
lolibrary.org/node/855
22890yen

Little Bird Cameo OP, Bordeaux
lolibrary.org/node/9204
24990yen

Juno Skirt Black
lolibrary.org/node/912
13440yen

Juno Skirt Rose
lolibrary.org/node/912
13440yen

Ribbon Pocket Skirt
http://lolibrary.org/node/1233
13440yen

Torchon Lace Plain Standing Collar Blouse
lolibrary.org/node/8260
13440yen

Versailles Rose Blouse Pinkxoffwhite
lolibrary.org/node/4233
12915yen

Classical Stripe Blouse
lolibrary.org/node/2089
13965yen

Pintuck Lace Blouse
http://lolibrary.org/node/967
13965yen

Fleur De Lis Blouse Blue
lolibrary.org/node/1201
8295yen

Emelie Crown Sweater Blue
http://lolibrary.org/node/1029
9345yen

Sleeve Ribbon Knit Pullover
http://lolibrary.org/node/1003
8925yen

Sleeve Ribbon Knit Bolero
http://lolibrary.org/node/1007
10290yen

Heart Scallop Basket Bag White
http://lolibrary.org/node/1156
9975yen

Velvet Ribbon Fur Boot Toppers Ivory
http://lolibrary.org/node/9199
3150yen

Rose Lace Cummerbund Belt
http://lolibrary.org/node/3315
8925yen

Linderhof Head Dress
http://lolibrary.org/node/4206
5040yen

Fur Ribbon Scrunchie
http://lolibrary.org/node/3884
2415yen

Pearl Ribbon Head Dress
http://lolibrary.org/node/4204
3675yen

Lorraine Head Bow
http://lolibrary.org/node/1236
1995yen

Missing stock photos of 4 items:


1 cutsew blouse
1 headdress
1 Umbrella
1 scrunchie

While I got great value for my money (5x value including shipping!!) A lot of the things don't suit my style and so I'll be putting things up for trade/sale. However I'm not going to make a sales/trade post until I get to Canada so I'll just take offers from people who happen to spot this around the internet for now~

I've decided to keep Little Bird Cameo OP, Cross Neck Tiered Jumperskirt, Fleur De Lis Blouse and Classical Stripe Blouse so far, might also keep the fur scrunchie and cummerbund belt.

I'm really glad I got the luckypack and it was a lot of fun and a lot of pretty clothes!

Also, I've done my first day of Eat Stop Eat or IF and I'm trying it for a second time today since I have the day off. It's been going really well and I'll put a rundown of how I've felt tomorrow if I have time!

Hope everyone's doing well!

Sunday, September 25, 2011

And so the rock is set in motion

It is more than time to get moving.
For a long time I've been planning to go stay with my boyfriend and potentially live with him for a prolonged period of time. I am one of the lucky ones. My boyfriend has a steady job, and he lives in a country which allows you to stay for up to 6 months as a tourist and also has an international experience program which allows you to stay in the country for a year and during that time work and travel freely. 


In 2 months (almost exactly, I'm planning to leave on the 26th of November). I will be traveling to him for a 5 month long stay as a tourist. I will of course not be allowed to work, but I will work on my etsy shop and start making things to sell for it and through that help support my living expenses. After that I'll go home to get my International Experience Visa and then be off for a year.


This means I have to get started with my moving now. I have prepared by selling and trying to sell the things that I've already cleared out of my room. I still have 3 moving boxes, 1 of shoes, 1 of clothes, and 1 of mixed Japanese things like manga and all that with some clothes to go with it. I will keep trying to sell things, got an ad up for shoes @blocket which is like a swedish version of craigslist. Will take things a little at a time, easier to keep track of things that way.

Also some new fitness things I've been planning to start!

For a while I've been doing Body Weight exercises and a bit of running. I've been having trouble with dropping my body fat% and those abs aren't getting more visible. Thus I am going to up my running by adding some variation, one long run at moderate (talking) speed, one short fast 30 min run and one with interval training. I'll start with that and see how it goes, if it goes well I might add sprinting to that and a recovery run

Also, because it's hard for me to control my food intake or more like what kinds of food I eat due to not having full freedom with what to cook I have decided to try out IF - Intermittent Fasting. I've read a book about it with several studies linked to it and it's showed me a lot of health benefits. I'm going to go by eat-stop-eat to begin with and see how it works for me. What it asks for is for you to fast for one or two 24h periods each week, the good thing being, you never go a day without eating! For example I'm trying it out today, I had my last meal just before 6 p.m, and thus I will fast until 6 p.m tomorrow. After that I will eat again like I normally do, no extra large meals or treats or anything.

I'm hoping this will not only help me to go that extra mile, but also teach me to control those urges I have to eat or snack, every time I'm bored, when my brain makes me think I'm hungry.

I will report back and let you know how it goes! 

I am also expecting my Innocent World Oddment B luckypack! Yup ladies and gents, that's 400000yen worth of IW clothing and accessories. It will be at my boyfriends place by tomorrow and he will open it for me so that I can see all the goodies, I will of course post pictures and a rundown of what I got here afterwards. Not going to keep it all.. I think! You never know, a lot of people have gotten fantastic things so far!

Keep your eyes open! 

Friday, August 26, 2011

A declaration of feeling

It is not often, that a young lady of little accomplishment and only mediocre talent may be as fortunate as I have been.
I bless myself on being able to love and marry whomever I wish, to not be obliged to marry for money or position in society.
I am fortunate to have found such a man, and to possess such a heart.
This man will not give up on me, he will not by any means let anything influence him otherwise.
For me he crosses oceans, for me he fights. I am sorry to say that I am not grateful enough for what he brings to my company. For he is by sure the most amiable man I will ever know and I will for all future leave my heart in his hands.

To you I am forever grateful and I will never seize to give you my cherish.

Thursday, August 18, 2011

What Motivates Me?

In the world of fitness there's always a talk of motivation, it's usually a lot harder to get motivated then to actually preform your workout. Some days everything seems to be working against that motivation and you don't see a single reason to work out. Well here's 6 things that I think about to always keep me up and running!

6. Defeat
In everyone's life there are always ups and downs, I lack a lot of self confidence sometimes and there are a lot of things working against me. However these things make me push harder and find better solutions to my problem instead of a "quick fix".

5. Constructive Criticism 
I never get motivated by people saying "you already look good", "you're fat" or "you're perfect the way you are". As someone who lifts weights I know I'll always strive to improve. Saying that there's no need for me to push further just makes me get annoyed and so does calling me fat. I don't respond to unjustified criticism or praise. Sure, hearing that I look great so far feels good! But I'm not "perfect" and I still have problem areas that need to be addressed. The perfect way to motivate me is actually to say, "you look great but your legs could use some more work" or something similar depending on where you feel my flaw lies.

4. Fit People
So many people have achieved amazing things with their bodies, I want to be one of them!
I've searched far and wide for a "goal picture", a girl with a similar bodytype to mine that has achieved the status of "fit girl". This has however so far deemed impossible, mainly because of my child birthing hips.
Seriously, my WHR is 0.66 atm and my hips are staying the same size while my waist is just getting smaller and smaller. Oh well. I have to create my own body and perhaps someday I can set a goal for a girl with a similar bodytype to my own.

3. Appreciation and Supporting Others
The day before yesterday I spent a couple of hours trying to coach an anorectic girl who wanted to lose fat and gain muscle because her doctors told her she couldn't lose weight (for obvious reasons). While the girl was obviously still very sick and none of us could get through to her someone posted this for me:

This made me happy in a very special way, I'd only slept 4h that night, I was very tired and I had planned to skip the gym for that day because of that. As soon as I saw this I got dressed and headed off to the gym.
People appreciating my help and my lust to support others is one of my favorite things. I love helping out and I love coaching people, and the best part is when they are happy for it.
Obviously this time around the person I tried to help didn't take it, but it feels good that someone think I put in a good job.
Also of course this has to be justified, I'm bad at taking credit for things and especially if I don't feel like I did anything special.

2. Unfit People
What can I say? Fat people, smokers, skinny fat people, drug addicts, alcoholics, anyone that's not into fitness. Why? Because I used to be one of them. I can't tell you how much I enjoy having a flat stomach. Being able to put on jeans without something pouting out and having to suck in my stomach when I walk around outside. They also encourage me to get better, I want it to be visible that I'm different, I'm not one of the crowd. I work out and I'm proud of what I have accomplished. This is one of my biggest motivations.

1. Boyfriend
My top motivator, always supporting me when I need it, always there for me. Gives me advice on my fitness when I ask for it and acts as my trainer whenever I'm over. He's not afraid to tell me when I'm cheating on my workouts (even if it's not thaat common) and even though he is quite biased he'll help me figure out what to do about my "problem areas". But most of all he makes me love myself for who I am. No matter your size, weight, goals or issues the most important thing is to love yourself for who you are. You can never achieve perfection if you don't.


All my love and the best of luck to you~ 
Vanessa

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

If you don't exercise your muscles they will wither, but don't forget; Your heart is a muscle too..

So this post title kinda has a double meaning both fitness and emotional/lolita related.

Fist of all to get the fitness related out of the way~

I ran 6k yesterday! (that's almost 4 miles) When I was younger I couldn't even bike half that path (it used to be my way to school) without feeling exhausted. I also remember having trouble to run like 1k without stopping!

This time I ran all the way and even had enough power to pick up the pace the last 5min. I did this the day after coming home from a con, and I'm still exhausted, I can't tell you how proud I am of myself. Trying for 7k next time and we'll see what happens.

I believe that it's really important to do some kind of cardio with your workout schedule. I never do it on the same day though because I believe I will not be able to give it my all when I do the second workout for that day. Lifting makes my bones strong, but my running has really made my heart so much stronger and it makes me feel great!

I'm also starting to lose weight for the first time since.. forever?! No seriously, I can't remember. I've been hovering at 60-62kg for probably like 6 ish months now. Before this weekend I started slooowly going down past 60 and I'm now at 58.5. I just hope it's fat and not muscle! But my scale also says that my bf% has gone down.

Now then on to lolita and emotional business!

So as mentioned before I went to a con this weekend. I was a volunteer for the wardrobe where visitors could leave their bags, valuables and other things during the days.

Lets start out with some lolis~




They are all such adorable girls <3 I wish I could rock AP like them <3

Cosplayers:

Waa Sailor Moon <3

Glados~

*See sword* Holy! Clare <3

My friend did Bridget lol, props for making it all by himself, and his first cosplay too I believe!

<3 I asked him if he was from Hetalia, I can't believe people bought it!

Gotta love Kuragehime <3 I'm impressed <3

Misc:

Me and my burger, delicious, Veggie burger with bacon.. yes people gave me weird glances! I had 3 of these throughout the con.. wonderful!

One of the artist alley tables, so much cute stuff! I hate saving sometimes!

Another table with gorgeous loli wear and dollie wear as well. Dresses were too short for me though, and again.. monies..


Her art was so varied and gorgeous! I'm so impressed still!


Cookie Monster does not like to swim!


Uhrm... yes.. shows off my bonnet?


My friend took some photos with me, all for fun, hoping to get some pictures to post here in a bit~


My outfit for Saturday, barefoot and comfortable, I love this dress but it's hard to find an opportunity to use it.



Someone left a Geodude in the wardrobe.. I-I just had too, it's fantastic!


Chuu from Chuu <3 Yup, I was really happy!

Now then, lets get emotional?!

A lot of lolis have troubles with relatives and most of the time parents who aren't supportive of our clothing.
I consider myself lucky when I say that has never really been an issue for me.
My dad joked around back when I dressed in sweet, saying that my shoes look like clown shoes, I laughed with him and saw no harm in it. 
My parents have always shown interest and it's very sweet of them and when I wore my VM sailor coat back in May my dad even commented on how good I looked in it! 
It feels great to receive that kind of appreciation from your parents!

Now then, this topic will be devoted to my fathers mother.
I really feel that I need to get this off my chest because it saddens and angers me so much.

Back in the beginning of the year when the topic of my style arose she started hinting that she liked me better in normal clothes, which she also mentioned when Vincent and I came over for lunch.
I'm fine with people telling me this, whatever it's not a big deal.

Back in May when I changed my profile picture on facebook to one of my lolita pictures she commented and said I should wear my normal clothes instead.
Again, I'm fine with this, whatever, not a big deal.

She has also discussed the issue with my mother, who just shakes her head. They don't particularly care if I dress up or not, I'm sensible about it and always ask them if it's okay if it's a special occasion, hey my parents where okay with me wearing lolita (classic) to my grandmothers funeral (something I deeply appreciated).

Now then, this weekend I brought out the lolita again, after all I'm at a con having fun with my friends, what's the harm?
One of my friends had a gun that I borrowed first for a photo in the hallway, I posted this on facebook.
My friends thought it was awesome, however my fathers mother posted saying "Grow up Vanessa!!!!!!!!!"
It pissed me off, but worse was yet to come. 

Later that day my had a photoshoot with me (as I posted above). Most pics were with another friends camera but we took some with mine just to document it, again with the gun.


I had a lot of fun with this since it is totally out of character for a lolita and we had a great setting.
Now my fathers mother was not. I posted this exact picture to facebook a bit later, receiving this comment:
"This is by far the ugliest picture I have ever seen, bloody hell/ *insert other generic swearword*" (translating swearwords from Swedish is hard).
You can guess how pissed I got after reading this, I deleted both this comment and the previous one, reported both for harassment and blocked her from my facebook.

I really never had an issue with my fathers mother, but to push so much hate on your grandchild like that is just unbelievably mean. I'll never say a bad word to anyone online that I couldn't say IRL and here a relative goes out and says that she thinks a picture of me is the ugliest she has ever seen? I am baffled and shocked.
Am I over reacting? I don't see how she could make this well again, what on earth was she thinking?
Have you had any similar experiences?

Now I am not sad at all, but I am angry and it pesters my mind. 

I try my best to be nice to everyone and spread my heart, because everyone needs love but no one needs hate. If I don't spread love and use my heart I will become a hateful person, and no one would benefit from that.
So please, readers, spread the love, and keep your family and friends close.


Thursday, July 28, 2011

Vancouver~

Now I spent my last month in Vancouver.
I have never paid a visit to Vancouver before and I must say it's a lovely city.
I spent time with my boyfriend, discovered the city and met his family and friends.
I also went to High Tea for the first time with the lovely Viki on June 30th~
She wrote about it on her blog so give it a read!


My outfit:
Hair accessory: Hand Made by me~
Cardigan: ETC
 Dress: Hand Made by me~
Socks: Ergi
Shoes: ETC

Viki wore:
Parka: Liz Lisa
Dress: Angelic Pretty
Bag: Bebe
Stockings: Aldo
Shoes: DreamV (I so love their shoes, have a black pair myself!)

I had a lovely time even though my dehydration got the best of me.
I must say though High Tea is nothing for me, I've never been much of a lifestyler and while I love doing.. "classic things" it mostly involves reading old books.

We also went on a great hunt trying to find me a foundation. I am very very fair and I can never find anything just light enough. I tried several including Armanis foundation which was good and while it was quite light it didn't give me the lightness I was looking for and just covered up my current redness (due to sunburn).
We went and looked at Anna Suis foundations and I tried their lightest one.
In retrospect I am so glad I chose it because it really really matches my original skin tone well as well as covers up the small imperfections. It also has a 25spf and smells like roses~ I also bought an eye shadow pen to get their gift pack which contained a lipstick, hand cream and some other small things.

I felt really bad most of the day and I really hope Viki will forgive my crankiness, lolita really gets hot after a while!

On July 1st Vincent and I went out to look at the fireworks since it was Canada day~
It was freezing but I'm glad I got to spend the evening with him like that.
I have so much love for this guy haha!

This is how he looks in my head, because he's always so happy!
But yes, we went and had a BBQ hosted by our wonderful friends Jay and Lin.
Vincent is here modeling the magic creation of awesome: Strawberry, bacon, cheese and dulce de leche <3


Blurry pic of my two favorite hosts~


America!
We went on a day trip to Seattle with the super awesome Herman who drove us the whole way.
Now I never told you this Herman but I really do think you are awesome, remember that if you read this!
We had a great time, visited the farmers market, an awesome comic book and related things store, had awesome burgers at the Cheese Cake Factory and drove back through the outlets where we shopped till at least I was broke.

I also met the two super cool and creative people Jeanine and Jordan, they are really awesome as well but I never took a picture fore some reason.

So much happened, so much I didn't write here, but I can't. It was a whole month full with wonderful new experiences, crazy food, some working out and running too actually and a lot of new friends.
I miss Vancouver and I hope to be back really soon~

Next post will actually be something fitness related.. I hope!